irl things

[fluorite]

[ because sometimes things happen and you can't help it

there's untagged nsfw please beware and DON'T LOOK AT ME ]

Comments

[fluorite]

You're going to jam my fingers. How will I finger you again if you manage it?

[ Rude!!! Yuui tries to pinch at him instead. He will get his revenge... ]

I think you're the one who didn't give her a fair chance. All you wanted to do was have sex when we first met. You barely greeted her.

[ Even though Mokona only rubbed up against his leg and dipped. ]

[weaseled]

[He leans back with even more weight. Fuck y'all fingers, stay away from his ass.]

What, was I supposed to pay attention to her and ignore you? You would've gotten pissy if I did that.

[fluorite]

[ Yuui knows what he must do.

He starts wiggling his fingers, slowly inching them down Yael's ass. While he only plans to grab him or poke him, his point will be made. ]

I would not. I was actually trying to have a conversation, remember? It's not my fault you were ready to go at it immediately.

[ Except it kind of is. ]

[weaseled]

[How are those scrawny little bone fingers managing? Yael keeps trying to roll and rock against them and thwart their downward advance, but nothing is working. At least his ass is fat enough that Yuui won't be able to pry it from the porcelain long enough to violate it.]

And so were you. Pot, kettle.

[fluorite]

[ He manages to work his way down to Yael's ass, sliding his fingers underneath one of those cheeks. His fingers still before suddenly wiggling. ]

It isn't my fault you grabbed onto my thigh like some sort of possessed creature.

[weaseled]

[WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE FINGERS MADE OF]

Possessed by you and your flat ass, maybe.

[fluorite]

[ A mystery. ]

Maybe I should bulk up... want me to hit the gym?

[ Imagine him doing reps of any kind. Imagine it. ]

[weaseled]

Didn't I say I like you just the you are?

[CAUSE BAE UR AMAZIN JUST DA WEY U R]

If anything, you could do some squats. Your bony ass hurts.

[fluorite]

[ He's about five seconds from poking his fingers into Yael's ass crack and wiping that smug look off his face. ]

Fine. Show me how to do squats, get me on protein powder, do whatever you like.

[weaseled]

[Ah. Would you look at the time? Yael leans forward, flicking on the faucet and dousing them both in a spray of hot water.]

Maybe it'll thicken up if I pound it enough?

[fluorite]

[ Yuui jolts when the hot water suddenly comes on, and he scrambles out of Yael's arms. ]

Maybe. I think it's worth a try, don't you?

[ Smiling, he looks around for some shampoo so he can start washing that greasy head of Yael's. ]

[weaseled]

[Begone, thot (affectionate)...]

Sure. We'll see in the morning.

[Yael Jr is completely unresponsive downstairs, so he'll take a raincheck on the sex, offering up his hair to Yuui for scrubbing.]

[fluorite]

Don't worry about tonight, Sheza.

[ Once he has Yael's hair wet enough, he starts to rub the shampoo in, taking his time to massage his scalp with the pads of his thumbs with the occasional light scrape of his nails. ]

Tonight is all about me pampering my boyfriend until he feels better.

[weaseled]

[Ah, this feels nice. Yael hasn't had his hair washed by anyone in years, not since he was a boy too young to remember his birth parents and the love they'd showered him in. He keeps his eyes squeezed shut to avoid getting soap in them.]

I'll be sure to return the flavor on the future.

[...Ptoo. Got soap in his mouth.]

[fluorite]

I know you will.

[ He makes a face when Yael spits and redirects some of the shower water into his mouth. Clean it out!!

Once he's sufficiently waterboarded Yael, he starts to rinse out his hair, running his fingers through those long strands. ]

You have such nice hair, you know. I hope you're proud of it.

[weaseled]

[Bleh!! Yuui babies him too much, but Yael doesn't have the nerve to complain, let alone the inclination. With his hair nice and squeaky clean, he threads a hand through it, twisting damp strands around the ends of his fingertips.]

I kind of am, actually. No male pattern baldness here.

[Yael frees up a hand to tug lightly on Yuui's hair.]

But you're the blond bombshell here. I bet you've had some bozo wax poetic about how your hair shines like spun gold.

[fluorite]

[ Yeah, he has—a few times, actually, but Yuui simply smiles as he gets to work scrubbing Yael down. ]

Is that an offer to do that for me right now?

[ If so, he'll take it just for the comedic value alone. He doubts Yael has ever cracked open a poetry collection in his life. ]

[weaseled]

Huh? Oh. Sure.

Hear ye, hear ye. [A good start.] The blond has arrived. Hair like spun gold, he has.

[yoda?????]

[fluorite]

Eww! What the hell was that?

[ He gives Yael's back a loud, wet smack. ]

[weaseled]

[Yael breaks into full-bodied laughter, slapping the water so it sloshes in Yuui's face.]

You got what you paid for, dummy.

[fluorite]

[ Wow??? He thought all his hard work this evening would get him anything better than whatever that was.

So, in an act of extreme maturity, Yuui leans forward and bites Yael on the arm. ]

[weaseled]

[HELLO???

Yael doesn't even bat him off his arm. He just stares at him.]

How old are you, four?

[fluorite]

Four and still more mature than you are.

[ He resumes scrubbing at Yael's skin as if the last few seconds hadn't transpired. ]

Should I buy you a poetry collection? I think you'd like E. E. Cummings.

[ Yuui knows Yael would despise him. ]

[weaseled]

Is that a joke?

[What the fuck kind of name is E. E. Cummings?]

Anyway, I'll pass. I'm not much of a [wiggles hands] poetry guy.

[fluorite]

Wow, what a shock.

[ He's so! Surprised!

But he's also done with scrubbing Yael down, so after a quick rinse, he gets out of the tub. ]

I really would buy you a poetry collection if I thought you'd like it.